Waiting Game

Dear Little One,

I have neglected posting for quite some time. The list of excuses is never as good as simply sitting down to write. We're delighted to be expecting your little brother's arrival any day now. We're counting down until we have him safe and sound in our arms.

The best image we have of your little brother 29w 5d.

As you know, he's gotten extra special treatment in this pregnancy. First when they were a little worried about how sick Mommy was getting in May and June and then when her blood sugars got all out of control this summer. More recently she started to show signs of early labor and the doctors quickly put a stop to that.

So we've made it to the 36 weeks and 6 days mark. The same age that you were when everything in our lives changed a little over 4 years ago. It's hard not to feel afraid, apprehensive and a little anxious about the entire situation. Even with many expert eyes watching your little brother's progress your Mom and Dad are still on pins and needles waiting for his arrival.

This is how big Callan has grown!

Your other little brother, Callan is really excited to be an older brother. Of course, his 2-yr-old mind isn't sure how to process it all but when it comes down to it, he knows a few key things: you, Corban are with Jesus and Grandpa and baby Colter is in Mommy's tummy. He often goes into the nursery which he knows belongs to the soon-to-be-born mysterious one we always talk about. Yet he often asks us about you Corban before informing us of what you and Grandpa are up to lately. It's tender and fun to hear him speak so adamantly about you. I think he is able to see things we grownups cannot see.

Speaking of the nursery, we hope you don't mind us getting that ready for Colter. It think it's wonderful that you can share this part of their lives with them. It used to be painful to look at the mural and think about how you never got to come home to this room, but now it feels more like a way of you being there with each of them when they are so little.

We had to also paint the "ugly room" which WAS a combination craft/guest bedroom. After painting it, we also put in new carpet. Callan now has his "own room" as he describes it with a big boy bed. He loves it. We love how it transformed from ugly into Callan's room. We hope you like it as much as we all do.

Before the transformation...

After the transformation...

With his new bed and furniture

Corban, we sure miss you. Not a day goes by that we don't think of you and wonder what kind of things you would be interested in as a 4-year-old. As we watch Callan grow and anticipate meeting Colter we will always be reminded of you, the one who made us parents. Corban you are so important to us and you will always hold a place in our hearts. Watch over us, please. Know that we love you. And if it is ever possible, reach across that distance to us and help us feel you close beside us. I know Callan talks to and plays with you. I hope that he will always remember the older brother he has waiting for him in heaven!

And as for those little fears that sneak in as we await Colter's birth, help us with those too. Watch over your little brother and get him ready to enter our little family. We may not be perfect parents but we sure are anxious to have him join our little brood!